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How to Be the Friend You Want

What’s the most important quality you look for in a friend?

For some, it’s loyalty or honesty. For others, it’s kindness or courage. Whatever yours is, it’s probably something a friend does instead of what a friend says. Words do have power, but actions are often the foundation that your words are built upon.

It’s how we impact those in need, like Ketana did for Aadita. Ketana gained credibility to share the Gospel because of her actions.

I want to be a friend like her!

Aadita was a poor housewife whose husband spent all their money on alcohol instead of caring for his wife and two children. Since he wasted his own income, he would borrow money from neighbors to pay rent. And as you might have guessed, he never paid back what was lended to him. Aadita was left to suffer the consequences of her husband’s irresponsibility—no one wanted to associate with her.

That is, except for Ketana.

Unlike Aadita’s other neighors, Ketana was kind. She didn’t shame Aadita for her financial problems. In fact, she looked for practical ways to help Aadita! On many occasions, Ketana shared her own resources to keep Aadita’s family from going hungry. As a Christian, Ketana was demonstrating the Gospel in just the way Aadita needed to experience it.

What a beautiful picture of compassion!

Yes! Ketana also recognized that her periodic help wouldn’t be a long-term solution, though. So, she told Aadita about an Adult Literacy Class running nearby. Ketana was the teacher, and she was confident the lessons would help Aadita become self-sufficient.

Moved by Ketana’s ongoing compassion, Aadita joined the Adult Literacy Class. She quickly became the best student in class as she learned how to read and write!

But the biggest change came through a special training offered through the Literacy Class, focused on entrepreneurship. Aadita learned to make candles and other products to sell for profit. She could now use her own skills to contribute to her family’s income, paying off lenders and keeping food on the table!

Eventually, Ketana shared the Gospel with Aadita. While listening to her friend, Aadita realized that her new life was all because of God. She received salvation through Jesus Christ!

Connect the dots… How can I be like Ketana?

Aadita was able to believe Ketana’s words about Jesus because she had seen Ketana’s Christ-like compassion at work. Ketana showed the love of Jesus while sharing the love of Jesus, which gave her credibility as a friend and neighbor.

The words of the Apostle Paul in 1 Thessalonians 2:8 were reflected in Ketana, “Because we loved you so much, we were delighted to share with you not only the gospel of God but our lives as well.”

As we develop the compassion of Christ, it will flow from our whole lives—both in word and in deed. The beliefs we express will become the convictions we live, showing our friends that we’re more than just talk. Our friendships will deepen when the world sees compassion at work!


  • Ask God to show you where your actions do not reflect your words. Is there a relationship that needs to see your compassion at work?
  • Pray for God to show you tangible ways to love the people in your life. Who needs to experience the love of Jesus?


  • Pay it forward! Your kindness communicates compassion. Show your kindness by buying coffee for a stranger, leaving a hefty tip for your waiter, or buying groceries for a neighbor in need.